Sometimes I want so badly to be far away from here...

Just dettach. Muster what little cash I could muster with my scarce worldly possessions, take a bus and see where it takes me.

Wouldn't that be, in some way, more living that what I'm doing right now?

Commitment, responsibility, trustworthiness (does that exist?), accountability, are all good words, but sometimes I wonder if those are words for me.

I'd just want to be away, so far away. Be in a place where no one knows me, where no one can pre-guess me. Reinvent myself. Rebuild myself. Know myself.

Why is life so much about doing the same venial stuff over and over again, and not more about actually living? About having actual difficulties, actual enemies, actual stands? Why are all our problems so unreal?

And why do we even care? Why do we still care?