I want to get my nipple pierced. This has stirred great controversy amongst those near me.

Bel is dead set against it. Now it turns out he has NEVER really liked my piercings, but he could cope with it, but he definetely cannot take having my nipple pierced.

And I wonder why, since he sees it so rarely (said she with evident bitterness).

My brother is cool with it, and he even offered to take me, but that proved to be a mistake, too.... because Mom heard us when we were arranging the details and she asked him what I intended to pierce this time. And my brother, that ka-mai, told her.

Next thing I know, I'm listening to my mother wail about how disrespectful I'm being to my own body, how can I mutilate myself in such brutal ways, what is my problem, do I not love myself and thus love her? And have I even consulted Bel about this?

I can't deny I felt some wicked pleasure when I told her I had indeed told Bel about it, and that he was opposed to it, and that I planned to go ahead with it just the same.

Blah blah blah, blah blah blah, and how can you desecrate your body, your Temple (oh my) like this?

Sigh.

It probably doesn't make sense to most people, but hey, some people cut their hair, some people go shopping, some people change makeup, *I* like to have piercings. It's my body and my nipple, after all. There's a quote from "Secretary" that works remarkably well for the occassion, but alas, I can't find the script anywhere, so just take my word: In my book, there's no change without pain.

Every big change in my life has been marked by it. I choose to show it this way. And not even to others, but to myself. I'm not showing my nipples off in the street. I'm the only one who's going to see it every day. See it and remember. Suffer it.

Yes, I'm twisted, I'm sick, but it's also my fucking life. Deal with it, I'm on that.