go ahead

go ahead and ask me how everything went with my weekend.

I'll say fine, piece of cake, sunshine colors, except that we crashed the car on the way to the airport and that my 86-year-old grandma fell and broke her hip.

yay.

and I'd like to point out that I wasn't the one driving the car or the one who pushed my granny over. so please, someone, go ahead and tell me that everything that's wrong with my life is due to my pessimistic attitude.

sunday: the crash wasn't anything espectacular; it was more your garden variety fender bender, but given that 1) the other guy was a taxi driver and a male; and 2) we had to be in the airport to pick up Anneline in the next 20 minutes, it turned out to be a major annoyance.

the guy was the one who hit us, but he was out of the car and shaking his fists in the air the moment we parked to assess the damage. what were you thinking, how could you, it figures with women driving, yadda-yadda-yadda. really unpleasant.

M totally flipped out and I tried to be the voice of reason, but the man was quite obviously raised by wolves. I stopped trying when he yelled that he had nothing at all to speak with us, and that he wanted 150 dollars on the spot to fix his car.

so wait. he hits our car, he yells loudly at us, he demands an outrageous amount of money for a broken headlight and refuses to talk to us like people.... shouldn't that be called intimidation and robbery?

no. according to the policeman I finally managed to drag to the scene --because at first they wouldn't come, for we were on the airport ground and that's supposed to be a different jurisdiction, or something--, it was only the natural reaction of a hardworking man who's on his way home and is crossed by a couple of spoiled brats like us.

so in the end I had to walk 200 miles to international arrivals to get anneline and back with her super heavy bags strapped to my back while M waited for the insurance company. we'd planned on buying some champagne and strawberries to celebrate the frenchwoman's arrival, but instead we ended up visiting the police station and drinking very bad coffee. wasn't that fun!

(it was, but in a very pessimistic cynical way.)

monday: due to all this and the fact that the festivities prolonged until 3 in the morning, I overslept on monday and couldn't come back home early as I had planned. besides, it's been two years since the three of us were together, so I thought the world wouldn't come crashing down if I spent the day with them instead of coming right back home.

oh boy was I wrong. but I'm ahead of myself. I also chose not to come back here to my boondocks because I had an appointment with a new shrink at 4, so I thought it didn't make much sense for me to come all the way back here only to go back in the afternoon, so I just went to have lunch with my girlfriends.

all this time, I'm calling home every half an hour to let my Ma know of my plans and getting no answer. this is something strange, because there's usually someone here always, but since my dad's been gone our routines have been melting so I didn't think much of it. my mom knew where I was and with whom, and M's cellphone is written loud and clear in big blue numbers on our blackboard. I figured if there was a problem I'd be easy enough to get a hold on.

oh boy was I wrong again. anyway, parenthesis to talk about the shrink, provisionally dubbed dr. smellgood. he's a serious guy and he asked a series of non-threatening, vague questions I tried to answer honestly; then he closed his notebook and said something like 'hm, I'm pretty sure you have this form of long depression called *blahblah*; it happens every few years and it lasts a couple of years, but it can be treated.'

he left me agape, really. I hadn't even mentioned that I've noticed that my life is usually good for 2 or 3 years, and then it turns to shit (and for no good reason) for 2 or 3 years and I don't really know why or how to stop it. I told him to bring on the treatment, I was ready.

he said he first wanted me to have an EEG, because there were some dubious symptoms (like the twitches and weird noises) that he'd like to rule out before giving me any kind of medication. oy vey so, I'm also looking for someone who'll give me a cheap EEG. dr. smellsgood parenthesis ends HERE. ------------>

I didn't get home until 8.30, and then I found out that my grandma fell in her house at noon and my mom left for Puebla in a hurry. she didn't call M's cellphone because I'd said I'd be coming home early, so she just left a note and left.

later on she tried to call home and got more and more worried, and by the time I called her she was convinced we had been kidnapped, raped and thrown into a ditch, where our bodies would remain for no one to find, forever.

but mom, why didn't you call M later? well, because I thought that if you were kidnapped, they'd obviously taken the phones from you, so what's the use?

and of course everything ended up being my fault, because I'd said I'd be home early and I wasn't. so obviously the result was that my grandma fell and broke her hip. the end. welcome to my nightmare.

sigh.

my grandma is okay. not great, of course. One piece of good news was that they wouldn't have to operate on her; the fracture isn't very bad and can be mended by rest. I expect my mom will bring her here so she can rest better, but that won't be for a couple of days, she hasn't been released from the hospital.

so yeah, go ahead and tell me all these things happen because *I* don't have the right attitude. please do it.